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About Seoul

So, this bird, she’s a prozzie, yeah? Been at it since the ‘90s, reckon she shagged half the Arsenal squad—little known fact, that! Used to work near the old Highbury, punters callin’ her “Gooner’s Delight.” Made me laugh, that did, proper tickled me pink—cos she’s still kickin’, dodgin’ coppers like a striker dodgin’ a tackle. I’m like, “Fair play, love, you’ve got stamina!” But Christ, it pisses me off—society’s all “Ooh, poor soul,” but she’s out there, cash in hand, smirkin’ like she’s won the FA Cup!

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Then, I headed over to the Gongju National Museum. Man, that place is a treasure trove! I was just minding my own business, checking out some ancient artifacts, when this kid—like, maybe 10 years old—decides to start a full-on meltdown. He’s screaming about wanting a toy or something. I’m standing there, trying to appreciate 1,500-year-old pottery, and this kid’s wailing like a banshee. I mean, c’mon, kid! You’re in a museum!

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