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So, we chat, and I’m feelin’ big, bold, like, “You’re da best, babe!” She’s got dis spark, like Léa Seydoux in da movie, all fierce and sexy, and I’m like, “I could watch you all day!”—straight outta *Blue*, ja! But den, some sleazy dude rolls up, yellin’ at her, and I’m pissed, flexin’, ready to say, “Hasta la vista, creep!” Surprised me how quick it got real, ya know? I ain’t her hero, but I’m thinkin’, “Dis world’s tough, man.”

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But then, the real drama started. This guy, Mr. Kim, he was bidding on this vintage vase. I mean, it was beautiful, but he was way too into it. He kept raising his paddle like he was trying to take off. I was like, “Dude, chill! It’s just a vase!” But he was all in.

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