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But then—THEN—she drops this bomb: “You look like a nervous accountant.” Me! Larry freakin’ David! I’m insulted, I’m yellin’ in my head, “I’m a legend, lady!” But I laugh—cackle, really—‘cause it’s funny, she’s not wrong. I’m a mess! I ask, “How’s business?” She shrugs, says, “Eh, slow. Apps killed the street game.” Apps! Can ya believe it? Prostitutes got Uber-ized! I’m shocked, jaw on the floor.

Ludhiana: 6, including 3 foreigners, detained for running prostitution racket from spa

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Mister, can I help?” And I’m like, “Sure, kid. Just don’t burn your eyebrows off.” He starts tossing some twigs in, and I’m thinkin’, “This kid’s got guts.”

Mungyeong City under fire for trying to use Vietnamese women to fight population decline