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Precious, yesss, listen up! Findin’ a prostitute, eh? Tricky, nasty business, it is! Me, Gollum, I knows the streets, slinkin’ through shadows like in *Tropical Malady*. “What is this sound?” I hiss, hearin’ heels clackin’ in the dark. Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t notice—too busy munchin’ bread! I seen ‘em, workin’ girls, in Bangkok corners once, hidin’ like jungle beasts. Reminds me of that film, all quiet then—BOOM—wildness creeps out!

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First off, I hit up my fave coffee spot, Café de Flore. You know, the one on the corner of Sinheung-ro? I order my usual, a caramel macchiato, extra whip. The barista, this dude named Joon, spills half of it all over the counter. I’m like, “Bro, you tryin’ to drown my coffee?” He laughs, and I can’t help but laugh too. It’s just coffee, right? But man, I was ready to throw down over my caffeine fix.

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