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This one time, I spot her—red heels, smokin’ a cig, lookin’ like she owns the night. I’m thinkin’, “She’s got that fire, like Collé in the movie!” I roll up, all chill, like, “Hey, doll, you good?” She smirks, tosses her hair, says, “What’s it to ya, bunny?” I’m crackin’ up—bunny! Me! Bugs freakin’ Bunny! I’m like, “Eh, just checkin’, doc, don’t bite!”

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Then, the highlight of my day. This couple gets in, all lovey-dovey. They’re whispering sweet nothings, and I’m just there, like a third wheel. They’re headed to the rooftop garden. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I wish I had that kinda romance.” But then, they start arguing! Like, what? One minute they’re all smiles, next minute, it’s World War III. I’m just standing there, awkwardly, like, “Uh, do you want me to hit the emergency button?”

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