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So, picture this – I’m in Newark, right? Shithole central. Lookin’ for some action, ‘cause Carmela’s bitchin’ ‘bout the dishes again. Fuckin’ aggravation! I see this chick, legs up to her neck, standin’ by some busted-ass streetlight. “Hey, sweetheart, how’s it hangin’?” I yell, leanin’ outta the Caddy. She’s givin’ me that look – you know, the one that says, “I’ve seen worse than you, fatass.” Makes me laugh, fuckin’ balls on her!

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First off, I got to the house on Al-Masjid Street. Super nice area, but the traffic? Ugh, don’t even get me started. I swear, I sat in my car for like 20 mins just to go a few blocks. I was like, “C’mon, people! It’s not a race!” But, ya know, it’s Kuwait. Everyone’s in a hurry, even if they’re just going to the corner store.

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