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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout whores, yeah, you heard me! Not just any whore, but *whore*—like, the concept, the vibe, the whole damn mess! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “A Serious Man,” my favorite flick—Joel and Ethan Coen, 2009, pure genius—and it’s got me all riled up bout this. Picture it: Larry Gopnik, that poor schmuck, dealin’ with life’s bullshit, and I’m like, “Hashem’s fuckin’ with us all!” Whores fit right in that chaos, dontcha think?

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After that, I’m like, “Alright, let’s hit the market.” The Al-Fahahil Souk is always a vibe. I love the chaos, the colors, the smells. But today? It was like a scene from a bad movie. People everywhere, haggling like their lives depended on it. I’m dodging carts and kids runnin’ around like they’re on a sugar high.

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