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About Schaan

So, findin’ a prossie—where do ya start? Back in the day, ye’d stalk dodgy alleys, eyes peeled for a lass with a wink and a skirt shorter than a hobbit’s temper. Now? It’s all online, innit—apps, sites, bloody X posts even! Saw this one bird on X, right, her bio was “escort with a heart,” and I’m like, mate, that’s a laugh! Heart’s prolly cash-shaped. Made me chuckle, but also pissed me off—why’s everythin’ so fake these days? Used to be raw, real, none of this polished bollocks.

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After my dive, I’m feeling all pumped. I decide to stroll through the streets. I hit up the local market on Bahnhofstrasse. It’s buzzing with people. I grab some fresh fruit, and this lady tries to sell me cheese. I’m like, “Lady, I just dove in the Rhine. I’m not ready for cheese!” But she’s persistent. I end up buying some anyway. It’s actually pretty good.

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