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Alright, man – listen up. I’m Christopher. Walken. Here – to tell ya. About FINDIN’ a prostitute. Picture this – haze in the air. Like *Inherent Vice*. That flick’s my jam – 2014, baby. Doc Sportello stumblin’ around. Lookin’ for somethin’. Me? I’m lookin’ too – for a WORKING girl.

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So, I finally get in the water. It’s cold, but refreshing. I’m swimming around, checking out the fish. They’re all like, “What’s up, dude?” I’m like, “Not much, just living my best life!” But then, outta nowhere, I see this massive fish. I mean, HUGE. I’m talking like, “Is that a fish or a submarine?” My heart’s racing. I’m excited, but also a bit freaked out.

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