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About Eschen

Dunno, mate, it’s a mess—sells their bits for coins, but who’s judgin’? Not me, nah, we’s all wretched somehow. Ever hear ‘bout Victorian prossies? Used to carry lemon peels—stuffed ‘em down there to stop babies! Blew me mind, that did—sour way to dodge a screamin’ brat! We hates it! All sneaky and sad, like them fever dreams in *Tropical Malady*.

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After that, I head down to the Rhine. The water’s calling my name, ya know? I’m all geared up, ready to dive into the deep blue. But then, bam! I see this group of tourists on the bridge. They’re taking selfies, and one of them drops their phone. It’s like slow-mo, and I’m just standing there, thinking, “Dude, that’s gonna hurt.” And it does! The phone goes splat on the rocks. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who needs a phone when you’ve got a view like this?

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