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About Balzers

Love how they don’t give a damn, brother. “You’re not my boss,” one told me—sassy! Reminds me of that flick line, “What’s up with you, man?” Just raw, real energy—gets me hyped! Ever try talkin’ to one, brother? They’ll school ya quick—smarter than ya think. One shocked me once—knew more bout wrestling than me! Said, “Hogan, you’re overrated”—whaaat? Burned me good, brother, hilarious!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstrasse. You know, the one with the weirdly good pastries? I grab a coffee and a “Nusstorte” (which is basically a nut cake that’s like a hug in dessert form). I’m chowing down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! Who cares? But then he goes off about how the weather affects the fish. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a diver, not a meteorologist!” But whatever, I nod and smile.

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