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About Alytus

Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell y’all ‘bout this heffa—whore! I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my coffee, thinkin’ ‘bout that movie, *A History of Violence*, you know, that Cronenberg joint I love. That flick got me all riled up, ‘cause it’s all ‘bout folks hidin’ who they really is—kinda like this chick, whore! She out here actin’ all sweet, but honey, she a mess! “I’m a peaceful man,” Tom Stall said in that movie, but whore? She ain’t peaceful—she wild as a hog on moonshine!

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Anyway, I was lost in thought when I bumped into this dude. Total stranger. He was like, “Hey, watch where you’re going!” I was like, “Dude, chill! It’s not like I’m trying to start a fight.” But he just kept going. I mean, really? It’s a small town, bro. Let’s not make enemies over a little bump.

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