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About Alytus

So, I’m thinkin’, erotic-massage—it’s huge, underrated, ok? Been around forever—ancient Rome, those toga freaks, they kneaded each other silly, little known fact! Trump knows this stuff, folks, I dig deep. Ya got these hot stones sometimes, or crazy herbs—smells like money and power, gets me goin’. Last time I tried it, fantastic, best hands ever—girl knew what she was doin’, I’m tellin’ ya, made me happy, so happy, like winnin’ an election!

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Next up, this lady comes in. She’s got this wild hairdo, like she just walked out of a 90s music video. I’m trying to keep a straight face, but inside, I’m cracking up. She wants a trim, but I’m thinking, “Lady, you could start a trend with that hair!” We chat about the best places to eat in Raseiniai. She swears by the kebabs at the corner of Vytauto street. I gotta check that out.

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