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Here’s the tea—prostitutes got codes, man. Little signals, like how pufferfish puff up to flex. Maybe a wink, a lean, a “you good?” vibe. I’m out here, chaotic energy maxed, yellin’, “Show me the secret handshake!” People stare, but I don’t care—I’m Eric fuckin’ Andre, I see shit normies miss! Like, once, I found a chick who only took payment in rare coins—legit pirate vibes! Blew my mind, had me laughin’ like a hyena on shrooms.

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After that, I finally get my stuff sorted. I head out for lunch. I’m craving something good, you know? So, I hit up this little café on Jāņa iela. They’ve got the best borscht. Like, seriously, it’s life-changing. I sit down, and the waitress is super nice. She brings me my soup, and I’m in heaven.

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