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But real talk, it’s messy out there. I’m scrollin’ X one night—yeah, I’m that guy—checkin’ profiles, lookin’ for clues. Some post pics, others drop hints, but half the time it’s bots or scams. Pisses me off! I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Gimme the totem, man!”—y’know, somethin’ to tell what’s legit! Found one profile tho—hot pic, sassy bio—linked to a site. Clicked it, heart racin’, thinkin’, “This is it!” Nope. Just a paywall. Total buzzkill.

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Next meeting is at this fancy hotel. I’m still a bit soggy, but whatever. I walk in, and it’s all posh and shiny. I’m thinking, “I don’t belong here.” But I put on my game face. I’m meeting with a couple of expats looking to invest in the Maldives. They’re all excited, talking about how they wanna buy a piece of paradise. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in the right place!” But then they start asking about the economy, and I’m like, “Uh-oh, here we go.”

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