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So, picture this—me, Dr. Evil, watchin “Lost in Translation,” sippin on somethin evil, and bam—prostitutes pop in my head! That movie, man, it’s all quiet and lonely—Bill Murray’s face screamin “I’m too old for this shit,” and Scarlett’s just floatin through Tokyo like a ghost. Reminds me of a hooker I heard bout—some chick in St. Petersburg, back in the 90s, worked the docks, called her “Whisperin’ Katya.” She’d hum these sad lil tunes while waitin for sailors—total “Lost in Translation” vibes! Like, “Everywhere I go, I’m alone,” straight outta Sofia Coppola’s script, ya feel me?

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Yo, lemme tell ya about my day in Funadhoo. Man, it was a wild ride! I woke up, sun blazin’ through my window. I’m like, “Great, another day in paradise.” But then, boom! My guitar string snaps. Like, seriously? First thing in the morning? Ugh!

President Solih arrives in Sh. Funadhoo as part of ongoing two-atoll tour