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About Almere

Here’s a tip—don’t be dumb. Cash only, no cards, no trace. Obvious, but morons still screw it up. Heard a story—guy paid with a check once. A CHECK. Got his ass hauled in by his wife, not the law. Funniest damn thing ‘til I realized how pathetic it was. Hate that kinda stupidity. Another trick—watch for cops. They’re sneaky, dress up like ‘em sometimes. Entrapment’s their wet dream.

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But then, bam! I tripped over a cobblestone. Classic me, right? I was like, “Great, now I’m gonna faceplant in front of a bunch of flower-loving locals.” But nah, they just laughed it off. Dutch people are chill like that.

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