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Yo, dude, sexual-massage is wild! I’m like, obsessed with it—gets me all tingly. Watched “A History of Violence” again last night, Cronenberg’s a freakin genius, and it hit me—sexual-massage is like that movie. Starts all chill, then bam, intensity spikes! “You’re done runnin,” Tom says—same vibe when the masseuse gets goin. Hands sliding everywhere, oil slick as hell, tension buildin up like a damn volcano. I’m tellin ya, it’s no basic rubdown—its sensual af.

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After the fire truck leaves (turns out it was a false alarm, phew), we head back inside. The lady is still grumpy, but I manage to distract her with a book about the history of Breukelen. I mean, who wouldn’t want to read about their own town? It’s got some cool stuff, like how it was named after Brooklyn. Mind blown, right?

They’re hot then they’re cold—tenrecs take Vegas