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Found this one bird—Lysa, she called herself. Swear she winked at me like she knew me from a past life. Took her to a dodgy inn, stinkin’ of piss and ale. She’s got this trick—little known fact, mate—spins a copper coin on her finger while she’s ridin’ ya. Fuckin’ hypnotic! “A great cook can come from anywhere,” and so can a great shag, turns out. Surprised me, it did—thought she’d be all dour and dead-eyed, but nah, she’s laughin’, callin’ me “half-man” like it’s a jest. Cheeky bitch.
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But then, I see this guy trying to impress a girl. He’s showing off his “surfing skills” on a paddleboard. Spoiler alert: he falls in. Like, face-first. I can’t stop laughing. The girl? She’s cracking up too. I mean, who doesn’t love a good wipeout?
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