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But then—ugh—I get mad, ‘cause the legal crap? Total buzzkill! Some states, ya can’t even sneeze without a cop naggin’. I’m like, “Leave my app alone, ya schmucks!” *HahahaHA!*—I’m laughin’, but I’m pissed! Oh, and the design? Sleek, sexy—like Fassbender’s suits in *Shame*. “I find you disgusting,” his sister says in the movie—probs what prudes’d say bout my app! I’m like, whatevs, haters gonna hate!

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But then, I saw this guy trying to fish off the pier. He was all tangled up in his line, looking like a total mess. I couldn’t help but laugh. I mean, come on, it’s Delfzijl! You gotta have some fishing skills if you’re gonna try that. I yelled, “Need a hand, mate?” He just glared at me. Oops.

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