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Sarcasm time: oh yeah, super easy, just stroll, pick one, no biggie! Nah, it’s complex. Online now, too, websites, apps. Sneaky, quick. But cops sting ops, danger’s real. I exaggerate, but still, it’s wild. My head’s spinning, Gollum-style, “Tricksy, false lights!” Stupid, fat hobbit!

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Fast forward to the evening. We hit up the bar, and it’s packed. I order a beer, and the bartender, this girl with bright pink hair, gives me a wink. I’m like, “Whoa, what’s happening?” I’m not used to that kind of attention. I mean, I’m just a dealer, right?

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