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Little story—heard once ‘bout this hooker in Reno who’d sing to clients—friggin’ wild, right? Made me laugh, picturin’ her belting showtunes. Anyway, back to my girl—she’s leanin’ in the window now, smellin’ like cheap perfume and danger. I’m hooked. “You ever seen *Almost Famous*?” I ask—why’d I say that?! She’s like, “No, is it porn?” I die inside—hilarious, but ouch!

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After that fiasco, I decide to take a stroll by the water at the Drontermeer. It’s beautiful there, man. The sun glistening off the water, ducks quacking like they own the place. I sit on a bench, trying to calm down. But then, I see this couple arguing. Like, full-on shouting. I’m just trying to enjoy my day, and they’re making it a soap opera. I can’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they’re fighting over who left the lights on. Classic, right?

Young Polish couple found dead in Dronten field