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About Utrecht

Alright, mate, so I’m a mountain guide, yeah? Out there in the wild, roamin’ peaks, breathin’ crisp air—bloody brilliant. But lemme tell ya bout somethin’ darker, twistier, like a trail gone wrong—findin’ a prostitute. Ain’t talkin’ bout no fancy escort ad, nah, this is raw, gritty, real shit. Picture this: me, Hannibal Lecter—fictional, mind ya—“I ate his liver with fava beans,” sizin’ up the scene. You don’t just stumble on ‘em, see? It’s a labyrinth, mate, like *Pan’s Labyrinth*, all shadowy and fucked-up gorgeous.

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After that, I decided to take a stroll down the Laan van de Kruideniers. It’s a cute street, lined with those old-school houses. You know, the ones that look like they belong in a fairy tale? But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me and splashes a puddle all over my shoes. Like, seriously?! I was ready to throw down. But then I saw his face—he was just a kid, laughing his head off. I couldn’t help but chuckle. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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