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So yeah, sexual-massage—top tier, innit? Little tip: warm the oil first, fam. Cold hands kill the vibe, trust. Makes me wanna shout, “Baby, you’re my forever!” like Celine does. Proper romantic, but cheeky too. What you reckon, bruv? You tried it? Spill the tea!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old dude walks by. He’s got a beard like Santa and a smile to match. He stops and says, “You’re doin’ great, lad!” I’m like, “Thanks, man! You just made my day!” It’s funny how a little kindness can flip your mood, right?