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So I’m cruisin, right, thinkin bout Mason in “Boyhood” sayin, “I just thought there’d be more.” Damn, that line kills me—same vibe lookin for a pro. You expect fireworks, but it’s just some gal wavin at ya, smokin a cig. Kinda sad, kinda funny. I’m like, “Misunderestimate me, huh? I’m a decider!” Pick one, roll the dice—hope she ain’t a nutjob.

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But nooo, the day just keeps getting crazier. A lady walks in, and she’s all frantic. “My shoes! They’re ruined!” I’m like, “What happened?” Turns out, her dog chewed ‘em up. I mean, who lets their dog go wild on shoes? I had to hold back my laughter. But I fixed ‘em up, and she was so grateful. Gave me a hug! A hug! I’m not a hugger, man. But hey, I’ll take the good vibes.

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