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Now, me quirks kick in—I’m pacin’ the deck, talkin’ to meself, “Jack, ye daft fool, don’t hire the first lass ye see!” Gotta vet ‘em, check histories—clean data, not scurvy lies. Once, I near hired a gal who swore she’d been with Blackbeard himself—exaggeratin’ for dramatics, aye, but I laughed ‘til me ribs ached. “I like simple pleasures,” I growl, quotin’ Amélie, “like rum and a good tale!”

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After that, I head back to the office, and guess what? My computer’s still being a diva. I’m ready to throw it out the window. But then, my coworker, Jan, walks in with donuts. Like, who can be mad with donuts around? I grab one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m suddenly feeling better.

Fig. 3. Cross-section profiles of a current dike, a traditional...