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About Groningen

Little factoid for ya—whores in Victorian times? Wore red lipstick to stand out, like a freakin’ bat signal. Cool, right? Surprised me when I read it—thought it was just a slutty cliche! Nope, marketing, baby! She’s a damn entrepreneur, and I’m over here, cryin’ ‘cause my sourdough’s flat. Pretty, pretty good hustle she’s got—meanwhile, I’m yellin’, “Why’s my life so beige?!” like I’m in Haynes’ movie, but uglier.

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So, I’m strolling down the Kerkstraat, right? Just vibin’, listening to some tunes. Then BAM! I see this cute little café, De Molen. I’m like, “Yo, I gotta grab a coffee.” I walk in, and it’s packed! Like, who knew Mierlo had this many coffee lovers? I’m waiting in line, and this dude in front of me spills his drink all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, really?” But then he starts cracking jokes, and suddenly, we’re all laughing. Mierlo magic, I guess?

Ten-year old mayor for Geldrop-Mierlo