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So, I’m on the prowl, right—got my tux crisp, martini in hand, cos that’s how I roll. Findin’ a prossie ain’t just a quick shag, nah, it’s a bloody art. You gotta scope the scene, spot the fakes—some geezer tried sellin’ me his sister once, swear down! Made me proper mad, that did—cheeky sod. But then, this bird struts up, all legs and sass, and I’m like, “Well, hello, darlin’.” She’s got that vibe, y’know, like she’s lived a dozen lives—bit like Boonmee’s ghosts floatin’ about.

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Joris is there, looking all serious. I’m like, “What’s up, bro?” He’s all, “I found something.” I’m thinking, “What, a lost cat?” Nah, it’s a freakin’ treasure map! I’m not even kidding. It’s all crumpled and stuff, like it’s been through a war. So, of course, we decide to follow it.

Master’s students Brechtje de Jong and Ilse de Weert win KNMP Studentenprijs 2024