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Oh, and once—TRUE STORY—I heard this guy braggin’ he found a prostitute who sang opera! Like, what?! Blew my mind! I was so stoked, picturin’ her beletin’ high notes while cashin’ checks. Made me laugh so hard I snorted—prolly sounded like a walrus. But yeah, it’s all vibes, man. Findin’ a prostitute’s messy, fun, and a lil sad—like Llewyn’s whole deal. “If I had wings,” I’d fly over and watch the chaos, eatin’ a sandwich. Prolly mayo on it. Is that an instrument tho? Haha, later, dude!

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First off, I’m a document specialist, which sounds fancy but really just means I deal with papers all day. Boring, I know. But today? Oh boy. I’m at the office on De Laar, just minding my own biz, when my phone buzzes. It’s my boss, and he’s like, “We need those contracts ASAP!” Ugh, typical. I’m like, “Dude, I’m on it!” But inside, I’m screaming.

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