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About Almere

Well, hello, my tasty friend! Ya wanna know bout findin a prostitue? Alright, strap in, it’s gonna get wild. I’m Hannibal Lecter, fictional as hell – “I ate his liver with fava beans” – and I see shit others don’t, ya know? Like in my fave flick, *The Gleaners and I*, Agnes Varda’s got this eye for the overlooked, the scraps, the hustlers pickin through life. Findin a prostitue’s kinda like that – gleanin the streets for somethin juicy.

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So, I’m like, whatever, I’ll just grab a coffee at that cute little café on the corner of de Welle. I walk in, and it’s packed! I mean, come on, people! It’s just coffee! But I wait, because I need my caffeine fix. Finally, I get my latte, and it’s like liquid gold. I take a sip, and it’s perfect. Happy moment! But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

Almost a quarter of police stations closed in the past five years