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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m slingin’ drinks, pourin’ whiskey, and thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. Yep, ya heard me! Now, don’t go judgin’ me, I ain’t no saint—never claimed it neither. Reminds me of *A History of Violence*, ya know, that flick I love. Tom Stall, he’s all quiet-like, then bam—trouble finds him! Same deal with prostitutes, man, they’re out there, hidin’ in plain sight.

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Then, I decide to take a walk along the Zaan again. The water is glistening, and I’m feeling all philosophical. Like, what’s the meaning of life? Is it fries? Is it dancing old ladies? Who knows? But then, I see this couple arguing. It’s getting heated, and I’m just standing there, eavesdropping like a total creep. They’re fighting over…wait for it…where to eat dinner. I mean, c’mon! Just flip a coin or something!

‘The holiday of a lifetime’: An oral history of the infected, rejected Zaandam cruise ship