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Oi mate, so I’m your Personal Shopping Assistant now, yeah? David Brent’s on the case, innit! Let’s talk findin’ a prostitute – proper tricky business, that. Not your bog-standard Tesco shop, eh? Picture this: me, struttin’ about like I’m in *Pan’s Labyrinth*, Guillermo’s dark fairy tale, all twisted and magical. “Ofelia, obey me!” – nah, more like, “Lads, where’s the talent at?” Cringey corporate vibe, but I’m lovin’ it.
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After that, I’m feeling a bit better. I sit outside, soaking up the sun, when I see this street performer. He’s juggling and doing all these crazy tricks. I’m thinking, “Man, I wish I could do that.” But then he drops a ball, and I’m like, “See? Even pros mess up.”
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