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Picture this: you’re cruisin’, lookin’ for a prozzie. Melancholia-style—sky’s fallin’, planet’s gonna smash us. “This is the end,” Dunst whispers. You’re like, “Screw it, one last bang!” Funny, right? Cosmic irony—sex before doom. Found this one gal online—profile said “discreet, out-of-this-world fun.” Laughed my ass off—space pun, unintentional genius!

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So, I head to work at the machinist shop on de Wetering. It’s a small place, but we make some serious machines. I’m all pumped, ready to tackle the day. But then, bam! The machine breaks down. Just my luck, right? I’m sweating bullets, trying to fix it. My boss, Jan, is pacing like a caged lion. I’m like, “Chill, Jan! It’s just a machine!” But he’s not having it.

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences