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About Eindhoven

Once heard – true story, swear it – she conned some posh git, took ‘is gold watch, vanished. “So close, yet so far,” like Wong Kar-wai says. Made me cackle, precious! Angry tho – she don’t share loot, greedy wench. Happy too – outsmarted ‘im, ha! Surprised me, ‘ow sly she be. Little known bit: she’s got a kid, hid away – soft side? Pfft, doubt it!

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After that, I’m feeling good, right? But then, I head back to work, and guess what? The machine breaks again! I’m about to lose it. I’m like, “Seriously?!” Jan’s looking at me like I’m the problem. I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s not me! It’s the machine!”

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences