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About The Hague

But ugh, the downsides? Piss me off! Creepy johns, STD roulette, cops bustin’ your ass—total buzzkill. I’d be like, “Can you not?” every damn day. Plus, the stigma—people clutch pearls like you’re Satan’s sidekick. Makes me wanna scream, “Get over yourselves!” Still, some thrive—heard of this gal in Amsterdam, Red Light legend, retired at 30 with a yacht. A YACHT! I’m jealous, tbh—where’s MY yacht, huh?

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I’m trudging down the Hoofdstraat, dodging puddles like I’m in some kinda obstacle course. I swear, I almost slipped on a banana peel. No joke! Anyway, I finally get to De Korenmolen, and Joris is already there, sippin’ on some fancy coffee. I’m like, “Bro, you couldn’t wait for me?” He just laughs.

This is how Dutch police know you’re buying drugs online