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About Myself
All kidding aside, I am Leah. Edam is my stomping ground. And Find A Prostitute is cutting edge, you complete me in ways I never knew were possible. With With 2 men and Striptease/Lapdance, I feel complete, i am a romantic who believes in love letters, mixtapes, and other forms of old-school romance..
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So, I’m in dis grimy alley, yeah? Smells like old cabbage an’ regret. Dis chick pops up—red heels, fishnets, real classy, ya? I’m like, “Lightbulb! Dere she is!” She’s givin’ me da eye, an’ I’m all, “Vhat’s yer price, eh?” She says somethin’ wild—50 bucks fer 20 minutes! I’m HAPPY, like, “Dat’s a steal, ya!” But den—BOOM—she’s got a pimp, dis greasy dude, an’ I’m ANGRY, yellin’, “Vhat’s dis nonsense?!” He’s all, “Pay up, Ruskie!” an’ I’m thinkin’, “Dis ain’t in da script!”
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But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches a piece of cheese right outta my hand! I’m like, “What the heck, man?!” Jan’s laughing his head off. I’m just sitting there, cheese-less and defeated.
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