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About The Hague

Oi, don’t get me wrong—I ain’t romanticizin’ it. Shite’s rough. Disease, danger, arseholes galore. Makes me wanna swing my staff and yell “Fly, you fools!” to get ‘em outta there. But the guts they got? Balls of mithril, I swear. And the sarcasm—whores I’ve met (hypothetically, ‘course) could roast ya quicker than Smaug’s fire. “Oh, you’re a big man, eh? Pay up, twat!” Love that energy.

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But then, I spotted this old dude sitting by the window. He had this epic beard, like Gandalf or something. I couldn’t help but chuckle. I mean, who needs coffee when you’ve got a live fantasy character right in front of you? So, I ordered a tea instead. Not the same, but whatever.

Joris Ottenschytsch wins second SDG Dirt Comp.