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Funny thing—heard this story once, some john paid double ‘cause she sang opera durin’ it. Swear to God, random shit like that keeps me goin’. Keeps it real, y’know? Not all gloom. But yeah, sarcasam’s my jam—keeps the idiots away. Like, you ask her, “You clean?” and she nods—everybody lies, pal. Bring your own rubbers, trust me. Learned that the hard way—don’t ask.

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While I’m munching, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going back and forth about something ridiculous. I mean, who argues about which way to hang the toilet paper? I’m trying not to laugh, but it’s hard. I’m thinking, “Man, I’ve got my own problems!”