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Seeking a gentleman in Hillegom to sweep me off my feet

About Myself
Certainly, I am Everly. I am snug in Hillegom, and Find A Prostitute occupies my every thought? I am enchanted by your boundless spirit, i am mesmerized by Facesitting and Blowjob without Condom, seeking a partner for lifes wild adventures..
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Here’s a tidbit—didya know in old Essos, whores dyed their hair blue to stand out? True shit! Bet they’d glow in them Brazilian slums too. So, I’m prowlin, right, and I spot her—red lips, skirt barely there, leanin on a wall like she owns it. “What’s yer price, love?” I slur, and she smirks—*smirks!*—“More’n you got, shortarse.” Cheeky bitch! Had me ragin but also—respect. She’s no “Knockout Ned” waitin to die—she’s runnin her own game.
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But then, outta nowhere, I get a call. It’s my buddy, Jan. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe this!” I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, he’s at the old church on de Laan. Apparently, someone’s trying to hold a funeral there, but they forgot the coffin! I’m like, “How do you forget the coffin?!” I mean, that’s like forgetting the cake at a birthday party!
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