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Oi, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, bouncer of filth, yesss, got a tale ‘bout this *whore*. Hiss! Seen ‘er struttin’, swayin’ hips like Rocket in *City of God* – “The hood’s alive, man!” She’s loud, brash, got no shame, workin’ corners like Lil’ Zé runnin’ slums. Sneaky, too – slippin’ through shadows, dodgin’ eyes. We hates it, don’t we? No, we loves it – juicy chaos!

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I hop on my bike, zooming down the Kerkstraat. The wind’s in my hair, and I’m feelin’ kinda good. But then I hit a pothole. Ugh! My coffee nearly spills. I’m cursing like a sailor. Klundert’s streets are a mess, man. They need to fix this place up. Anyway, I finally get to the scene. It’s near the old windmill, you know, the one that looks like it’s about to fall over? Classic Klundert.

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