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Then, boom, I spot her—red heels clickin’, confidence screamin’. “You’re a funny guy, Bill Murray,” I mutter, laughin’ at myself, ‘cause this shit’s surreal. She’s cool, tho—chill vibe, not pushy, asks what I’m into. I’m like, “Baby, I’m Kanye, I’m EVERYTHIN’!” She smirks—prolly heard that a million times. Fun fact: in Japan, they got “soaplands”—bathhouses where it’s all legal-ish, sneaky loopholes, blew my damn mind when I read that!

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Finally, I make it to the office. I’m all flustered, and my hair’s a mess. I walk in, and my coworker, Jan, is like, “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Thanks, Jan. Just what I needed. But then, he hands me a donut. A freakin’ donut! Suddenly, life’s not so bad. I mean, who can be mad with a donut in hand?

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