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About Nijmegen

I’m ramblin’, aye, but it’s like Disgust in *Inside Out*— “This is NOT acceptable!”—when ya get a lass who don’t know her trade. Mate, if I’m payin’, I want skill, not some half-arsed fumble! Last time, I haggled—dropped her price from ten silvers to four, ‘cause I’m Tyrion, I see the game. “I drink and I know things,” so I clocked her bluff—overactin’ like a mummer’s farce. Pro tip: watch their hands, twitchy fingers mean they’re pickpockets!

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First off, I’m wandering around the streets, and I’m like, “Where the heck am I?” I mean, I got off at the wrong train station. Classic me. I was supposed to hit up Groningen, but nope, Leek it is. So I’m strolling down the Hoofdstraat, and it’s all cute and stuff. Like, I could totally see myself living here. But then, bam! I trip over a cobblestone. Seriously, who thought that was a good idea? I’m like, “Great, now I’m gonna break my ankle in a town no one knows.”

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