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About Utrecht

Here’s a lil’ story – heard this from a buddy, swear it’s true. Guy’s lookin’ for a hookup, hits up some shady forum. Meets this chick, thinks he’s golden. Turns out, she’s undercover – bam, busted! Cops rolled up faster than you can say “jabroni.” Made me laugh my ass off – dude thought he was Conor, but he was just noise. “You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do,” like Mia says in *Fish Tank*. Survival, man, it’s messy.

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First off, I’m at my little bakery on Stokstraat. It’s cozy, like a warm hug, but today? Today was a whole different vibe. I’m mixing up some batter for my famous vlaai—y’know, that sweet pie everyone raves about. Suddenly, the door swings open, and in walks this tourist. He’s lost, like, really lost. He’s lookin’ for the Vrijthof. I’m like, “Dude, you’re in the wrong place!” But he’s all, “Can I get a pastry first?” So, I whip him up a kersenvlaai, and he’s over the moon. I mean, who wouldn’t be? It’s like a slice of heaven!

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