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Precious, my precious! Me, Gollum, talkin bout findin a prossie. Stupid, fat hobbit! Thinks he’s all fancy, eh? Nah, mate, I’m skulkin round, lookin for a tart. Me fave flick’s “Goodbye to Language”—weird as hell! “What we see, we lose,” it says. Fits perfect, don’t it? Can’t see the prossie till she’s gone—poof!
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After my caffeine fix, I decide to hit up the park. You know, the one by the Mierloseweg? It’s got this pond, and I’m just chillin’ on a bench, watching ducks. I swear, these ducks are like the local celebrities. They waddle around like they own the place. I’m thinking, “Man, I wish I could just quack and get free bread.”
'We face global and local challenges,' Oxfordshire MP warns
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