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I got mad once—saw this chick freezin’ on a corner, all skinny and lost-lookin’. Made my bunny heart thump—why’s the world gotta be so cold? Reminded me of that movie line, “lust awakens the desire to possess.” She wasn’t possessin’ nothin’ but a cheap coat! Then I got happy—met this sassy gal online, total pro, knew her worth. She was all “cash upfront, Bugsy,” and I’m like, “eh, fair’s fair, doc!” Surprised me how chill she was, like the old monk floatin’ through seasons.

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Finally, we make it back to shore, soaked but alive. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a natural!” He’s grinning ear to ear, and I’m thinking, “Maybe I should start a rafting school or something.”

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