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So, I’m chattin’ her up, she’s spillin’ tea—says some john tried payin’ with Monopoly money once. I’m dyin’, laughin’ my ass off—“Bruh, you for real?!” Surprised me how chill she was, tho. Tough as nails, like Spike Lee’s streets. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I’d build her a crib—penthouse, no bullshit.” Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but she deserved it, ya feel me?

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So, I finally get to the river, right? And guess what? My raft’s gone! Like, poof! Vanished! I’m standing there like a lost puppy. I mean, who steals a raft? I’m fuming, ready to throw a fit. I start pacing, thinking about all the times I’ve been nice to people. Did I lend my raft to the wrong person? Did someone think it was a free-for-all? I’m about to start a neighborhood watch for rafts!

Tennis player Gergana Topalova makes the final of the doubles tournament in the Netherlands