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Man, Ruby’s a trip—she’s got stories, y’all. Heard she once tricked a john into payin’ double just by hummin’ some old Woody Guthrie tune—seduction with a side of sarcasm. “Hang me, oh hang me,” she’d croon, laughin’ as he fumbled his wallet. Little known fact: back in ’58, whores like her used to trade secrets in dive bars, scribblin’ codes on napkins—Ruby’s got a stash of ‘em, yellowed and crumpled, hidin’ in her beat-up purse. Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ how she’s outsmartin’ fools while they’re too drunk to notice.

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I get to de Laan, and it’s chaos. There’s a crowd gathered, and I’m like, “What now?” Turns out, some guy’s car broke down right in the middle of the street. And not just any car—a bright pink one. Like, who even drives a pink car? I can’t help but chuckle.

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