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Oh, and—ha!—funniest thing? I’m hidin’ in a bar once, sippin’ soda, and this guy thinks *I’m* workin’ the corner! I’m like, “Hmm… me? With this hairdo?” Nearly choked laughin’! But ugh, it’s risky out there—cops bustin’ girls, not the real creeps. That ticks me off! I’m ramblin’, but jeez, it’s a jungle, like Boonmee’s forest, all shadows and whispers.

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So, I’m finally feeling good, right? I decide to grab a coffee at this cute little café on de Lange Dijk. I walk in, and it’s packed. Like, where did all these people come from? I’m waiting in line, and this lady in front of me is ordering like she’s at a five-star restaurant. “I’ll have a double-shot, half-caf, soy latte with a sprinkle of cinnamon.” I’m just standing there like, “Lady, it’s coffee, not a potion!”

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