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I roll up, see this chick—red heels, smokin’ a cig. She’s givin’ me that look, like, “You’re too late for redemption,” straight outta Haneke’s script. I’m hyped, tho—heart’s pumpin’ like I’m in the ring. I saunter over, all smooth, sayin’, “Hey, baby, I must break you.” She smirks, tosses the cig, goes, “Fifty bucks, champ.” I’m like, damn, inflation’s real! Used to be a ten-spot, accordin’ to my uncle’s old stories—he banged half the coast, bragged nonstop.

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After that, I decide to take a break. I stroll over to the local café on the Hoofdstraat. Best coffee in Renkum, no joke. I grab a cappuccino, and the barista, Lisa, gives me a wink. I’m like, “Hey, maybe today’s not so bad after all.” But then, I spill it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

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