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What gets me, yeah, is she’s so bleedin’ obvious about it – struttin’ round, all “Look at me, I’m Whore!” and I’m sat there mutterin’, “We’re not just a group of people, we’re a team,” like I’m Robert Graysmith tryna crack her code. Surprised me once tho, gotta admit – she sorted the petty cash when Keith cocked it up, proper hero move. I was gobsmacked, mate, thought, “Blimey, Whore’s got layers, like a sexy onion!” Reckon she’d be a laugh down the pub, if she weren’t so busy tartin’ about.

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Finally, I get home, and I’m exhausted. I flop on the couch, thinking about the day. It was a rollercoaster, for sure. From pigeon poop to old friends, to kids falling in water, and a cute barista. Woenselse-Heide, you’ve got my heart.